I Name the Next “Silver Linings Playbook” Follow-Up

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It’s easy for people to mock the stock-formula book title schemes of writers like “The Bourne Identity” author Robert Ludlum (his Wikipedia page says “The (Proper Noun) (Noun)”) or “The Firm” author John Grisham (in a story by BJ Novak, he’s enraged when his publisher releases his latest novel as “The Thing” – a placeholder title he gives all his novels and forgot to replace as a formality when he turned it in).

Writers considered more  literary often have formulas that are meant to evoke just as much familiar, formulaic comfort – they’re just supposed to appeal to a different type of audience, one who thinks it’s smarter or wackier or more sensitive.

Consider how much titles like “The Year of Magical Thinking” and “The Good Luck of Right Now” have in common with a title like “The Unbearable Lightness of Being.” Those books don’t have a lot of content in common, but it’s easy to see them targeting the same audience demographic – kind of like how movies and internet ads say, “IF YOU LIKED THE SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION, YOU’LL LOVE WHITE CHICKS 2.”

Therefore, in hopes of removing one last unnecessary step in the writing process, I present my pre-prepared list of novel titles for the next release by “The Silver Linings Playbook” / “The Good Luck of Right Now” author Matthew Quick. (You can mail me a check when you get the chance, Matt.) :

  • The Hour of Valuable Doings
  • The Back-Chamber Eating of People Parts
  • The Panty Drawer of Soon-to-Be Wonderings
  • The Wistful Wistfulness of Empty Wist
  • The Mystical Endlessness of Abortion Clinic Bio-Hazard Disposal Bin Emptying
  • The Rising-Up Trouser Snake Chutzpah of Life
  • The Empty Apple Core of Brokenhearted Life-Ending
  • The Linear Round-Ball Throwing Into Open-Cylinder Path of Bozo Greatness
  • The Quirky-ful Syntax-ity of Morally Ambiguous Dramedy Novel Title-age-ness-ing
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4 thoughts on “I Name the Next “Silver Linings Playbook” Follow-Up

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