Washington Square Park

Puke stained disciples
Baptized in fountain water
Spread offerings in bread
Crusts and pigeon seed
To the god of the park
That hums its loving hum
In the tiny space between
The steady pounding beats
Of filthy palms and fingers
On drum circle bongos.

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Good poems usually don’t have …

  • the word “betwixt”
  • italics font
  • a British accent (when the writer isn’t British)
  • centering
  • swirling colors in the sky
  • twinkles, twinkling, etc.
  • multiple references to the sun, the moon, sunsets, moonlight
  • … not to mention shooting stars
  • accompanying pictures of nebulae
  • general ramblings about love
  • general ramblings about fate
  • an utter lack of imagery
  • no interest in wordplay
  • syntax twisted around in awkward ways in order to fit a certain meter or rhyme scheme
  • whispers
  • sighs
  • dreams
  • self-help advice, chicken soup for the soul, etc.
  • overly specific relationship details
  • a copyright symbol and name at the end of it

Join my fantasy football league

Join my fantasy football league
Join my fantasy football league
Draft your fantasy football team
Join my fantasy football league

994841_10102678552271590_241802026_nCheck out my fantasy football team
Check out my fantasy football team
Live out your fantasy football dream
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Print out fantasy football ream
Lick up fantasy football cream
Light up fantasy football beam
Check out fantasy football team

Fantasy football
Fantasy football
Fantasy fantasy
Fantasy football

Fantasy football
Fantasy footfall
Manta sea wood wall
Panda seed good call

Fantasy strip mall
Fantasy ship call
Fantasy sit tall
Fantasy shit stall

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DERP my fantasy football DERP
DERP my fantasy DERPball DERP
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Naked Brunch

Starbucks sucks up fair trade bucks
Stay up get lucky yoga pants buddy
Unlocked chakra third eye opera
Push that park slope stroller on over

DIY dreams of vegan ice creams
Sonogram jelly white yuppie belly
Cool story bro 3D yellow embryo
Say yes to the gluten free wedding dress

Talk up uptalking facebook stalkers
Horn rimmed glasses on dog walkers
Thrift shop ironic
Vintage cleansing colonic
Speakeasy sipping
Artisanal gin and tonic

Like totally rebrand
Your social network standing
Unhand my apple logo
You tech unsavvy hobo

Port Authority

MAKE me laugh, clown.
Tell me just how many gleeful moon
Barks it takes to dislodge the ever-
Hopeful beating pickle heart
From your swiss cheese holed
Mouse gnawed
Cardboard
Skull.

Make ME laugh, clown.
Grin yellow and kiss my sweatful
Nervous, beery
Brow.

Make me LAUGH, clown.
In this cold bench, puke steps city
It’s better to drink your
40 ounce
Walking.

Make me laugh, CLOWN.
We change jingling polka dotted jesters,
You and I, gray beards bobbing,
You and I, ashed bellies shaking,
You and I are all
You’ve
Got.